My husband and I were invited to a reception for a new office building. We were in the car and almost out of our development, on our way to the reception, when I said, “I am having a lot of anxiety.
He asked me, “Do you want to go?”
“No, I want to go home.”
My husband drove back to the house.
Comparison is the death of joy.
― Mark Twain
In the driveway, while we were still in the car, I said,”I don’t want to go because I don’t feel like I am dressed right. I have on boots. I am not wearing a dress or heels.”
He said, “Wear whatever you want. Be yourself.”
We backed out of the driveway and went to the reception.
I cannot say this too strongly: Do not compare yourselves to others. Be true to who you are, and continue to learn with all your might.
― Daisaku Ikeda, Discussions on Youth
Why is it hard sometimes to feel confident in who we are? Why is it hard to be ourselves? Why do we compare our shoes and the clothes we wear to what other people wear?
I looked at the shoes on the women’s feet at the party. Their were open-toed shoes, very high heels, flat shoes, dress shoes, sneakers and one pair of black Doc Martens. Mine.
My shoes become me. What is in my closet? What shoes are me?
If you were a pair of shoes what would you be?
Deborah would be a pair of Dansko Clogs and Diane would be a pair of boots. Chris said, “I would be a pair of soccer sandals. Easy to put on, convenient, and perfect for the on-the-go but not fitness-oriented dude.” Kathleen would be a pair of Teva flipflops and Lotta would be a pair of zipper boots.
If everyone was barefoot but everyone wore hats we would compare what was on our head to everyone else.
Do I fit in? Is my hat acceptable? Her hat cost more money than my hat. Her hat is more feminine. Her hat is cuter. Her hat is a prettier color.
The desire to know the rules and to wear the hat that fits. Or the shoe. Or the dress. Or the suit.
What are the rules?
Personality begins where comparison leaves off. Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud.
― Shannon L. Alder
The rule is: There are no rules. Wear your heels, your Dansko clogs, your boots, soccer sandals your Teva flipflops and your zipper boots. It doesn’t matter what you wear. Be yourself. And as Shannon L Adler said, “Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud.”
In what ever fits your foot.
If you were a pair of shoes what would you be? As always I love to hear from you. Please click here to comment.